(Image via: Tumblr)

Today’s blog post has been brought to you by the word: ANXIETY. 

I work hard to be a cool, calm and collected human- but it is just that: work. I am a highly anxious- neurotic some might say- person, but usually it works for me. I come from two of the world’s best parents, whose anxiety, I am not ashamed to say, I have inherited. Did you know anxiety was inherited? Because my brother and I are living proof. But like I said, for the most part my anxiety works for me. And, if who my parents have become in their lives is any indication of how their anxiety worked for them in the long run, then I know I’ll be okay. My anxiety causes me to always be early, be highly organized and structured, write everything down, make lists and checklists… basically everything you would expect from an extremely Type A person. This doesn’t work for a lot of people, and in fact, annoys a lot of people. Which I totally understand. I annoy myself sometimes. But it’s who I am and I’ve come to terms with it, and tried to find ways to make it work. 

HOWEVER. When it comes to anxiety and this trip to Africa- it is five weeks away but it is already keeping me up at night. I’m making lists, and other lists, and checking blogs and pinterest for tips and packing hacks, and while I’m in the middle of one thing I’ll have another thought: wait. Did I put that on the list? Oh crap I meant to add that. Sometimes by the time I actually get to my list on my phone or computer the thought has gone (probably because I was half asleep when I had it) and I’ll have to wrack my brain to try to remember. In the end, it is usually something fairly trivial or uncomplicated that did not need to interrupt my REM cycle-  contact lenses? Did you really need to wake up and write contact lenses down? Like I would leave without them?? Hello. You can’t even SEE two feet in front of you without them.  And even if I could make it out the door without them actually in my eyeballs,  contact lenses have surely made it on one of at least several lists and could not possibly be forgotten (right?!). This would be one of those instances where I am annoying myself. But I digress...

Anxiety is good when it can move you forward, but it can also be paralyzing and interrupt your (okay my) much needed beauty sleep. The trick is to find that balance between calm and anxious. Between action and overwhelming stagnation. And ultimately between fear and taking a leap. I want to be a leap taker. I’ve always wanted to be a leap taker. The first hurdle is not letting my anxiety trip me before I even get there. 

Which is why I like to be reminded... 

              Photo from RH Reality Check